Kirsten backs the Blacks

During 2007's Rugby World Cup I was quite vocal in support of my best beloved New Zealand All Blacks, and made a few entries to that effect. Sadly things didn't quite work out the way they should have done and my boys were knocked out in the Quarter Finals.

Aotearoa: ka ora!

Kiaora!

(Come The Day and Come The Hour...)

Sorry I'm a bit late in getting to you, but what with school starting on the same week as the World Cup well, you know, "how much can a koala bear?"

So here, in summary, is the position:

1. New Zealand WILL win the Rugby World Cup this year, in fact New Zealand are so good they will, statistically speaking, come second as well, so far are they ahead of the rest of the world.

2. If New Zealand doesn't win, then either Australia or Ireland has to.

3. Sadly there are no spank-related bets with my Line Manager at school riding on this competition, although what with me having a few Rugby-mad girlmates from Scotland and RSA in my world right now you can imagine we do have some naughty things planned for those ladies whose teams don't win: (everyone except Kirstie). I do also have Aussie mates I've not told you much of, and of course the Irish cousins are involved too. I'll let you know how it all works out, and whether I can find girls across London and the Home Counties to support other teams. Five spanks per try scored against, who wants to be Japan? :-)

I'll not be commenting much on this all after now, I'm very very busy at school, but I thought it only polite to tell you where I am. So, well done so far to the lovely boys from home, also to the Wallabies, (who appeared to be wearing bras on Saturday, but I suppose when you play a team called "The Heroic Blossoms" these things happen), to RSA, England, and Namibia. Okay so Ireland actually won, but the Nibs played well and good on them for that.

Oh, and I am working on two new stories for you all, my lovelies, right now. One story was inspired by the lovely Tiny Miranda, the other is an Ellison Original and set in New Zealand.

Oh, and for those of you who don't speak Maori, the heading basically means "New Zealand, we're alive."

Whiti te Ra!
Allez les Noirs!

God defend New Zealand

So New Zealand have just defeated Portugal by almost 100 points, it looks dire for Ms House as Scotland now have to score that much this week to avoid her receiving a spanking from Miss Ellison: as per the arrangement.

And yes, I got mine! After New Zealand did not defeat Italy by as many points as Scotland scored against Portugal last weekend Kirsten had to make up the difference with a trip to lap-land, specifically Catherine's lap and the naughty end of a hairbrush. Skirt and underwear in place, but it was nice to be OTK again, even for such a short visit. It's been a while.

Thanks to all who are making comments on both blog and message to World Cup effect, I seem to have been ignoring the 20/20 cricket in South Africa, but when it comes to sport it is always Rugby first for Miss Ellison: especially since Australia is slapping Wales about the four corners of Caerdydd as we speak. Advance Australia Fair!

Well done Springboks: I have been supporting England (since I live in England, and with an Englishman) but to be honest I expected RSA to win. (Of course, they're Southern Hemispehere!) I spoke to Hanie DeKievert on the phone this morning and she was very pleased, we're meeting for coffee in Soho tomorrow after church, I shall of course pass on everyone's good wishes.

Good news: the story I wrote for Miranda is nearly ready to show you all, now just the one from Auckland, and maybe a new one for Foxy Geraldine if she agrees to it. Curtseygirl is waiting her turn online, as soon as Kirsten is finished with strutting about in her black top the stories will be back.

Enjoy your weekend my truly lovelies.
Kiwirsten (Webb) Ellis-on


All Black and Blue

So, who saw the mistake? I cannot believe that for the second time in a sporting bet I have been let down by my very poor Maths skills. Foxy is right to question whether the introduction of the cane for inept teachers might not be warranted.

Vis:

New Zealand defeat Italy by 76 points to 14: a 52 point victory, wheras Scotland score 56 points on Portugal. Since Kirsten has bet Catherine that New Zealand will outscore their opposition to a greater margin than Scotland will score in total, the penalty being spanks, Catherine then delivers four hard smacks of the hairbrush to the seat of Kirsten's upturned skirt, 56-52= 4.

Fair? Yes, until Kirsten this morning realises, two days after receiving her spanking, that New Zealand actually defeated Italy by 62 points, not 52 (76-14=62). Far from receiving four spanks FROM Catherine, Kirsten should have been giving six spanks TO Catherine.

And Catherine, smarty smarty Maths-type Scotty girl, knew all along!

This following on from my disasterous Cricket Brat bets with Daniel Roberts whereby we both had 15 divided by 5 as 5 (rather than 3) and Kirsten receiving two extra spanks for an England victory over New Zealand.

So, answers on a postcard, or better yet just vote below.

As you can imagine, I was very giggly when I worked this out, that cheeky little Kiltygirl. I rang her at work and she burst out laughing on the phone. Rest assured this matter will be dealt with!
(C'mon Italy!!!)




Scotland the Brave

Even I can subtract zero from forty. It's forty.

I can also subtract forty-two (Scotland against Romania) from ninety-five (New Zealand over Portugal): 95-42= 53. (Okay so I checked that one with a calculator.)

I can also add, 53+40=93. Plus six more owed from before, (I'll wear the four given in error as my own fault). Ms Catherine Margaret House: come on down for NINETY-NINE spanks.

Now here is where it got tricky, I've never been a big fan of those stories/images/ideas where girls are flogged so much, for me the maximum is the twenty-four of the strap that Catherine and I used to get from our Paul if we were ever "proper-naughty": so that is what we went for.

1. For tricking Kirsten, Catherine got her initial six with the strap. (From Kirsten.)

2. For the Portugal/Romania games, Catherine got twenty-four very hard ones on the bare with Kirsten's hairbrush, over Kirsten's knee. She also has to wash Kirsten's car next Saturday, and do all Kirsten's ironing. (Thanks for the idea Foxy.)

3. For the head-to head we forewent (foregoed?) the bet and settled on the usual "six of the best from the winner to the loser", which is the bet involving the girls at school. So Catherine got six across her skirt with Kirsten's ruler, and yes I made her come out to Hatfield and to school this afternoon to get it.

(Yes, poor Sarah did get six of the best from Hanie following the England vs RSA game last week.)

Thanks for your interest everyone, normal Curtseygirl service will resume in late October, but at the moment Kirsten is watching her lovely All Blacks and that takes priority.

(By the way, thanks to the Aussies who have asked, yes I do follow the AFL like a Tasmanian girl should, I am even more passionate about it than rugby since we do actually have Aussie Rules in Hobart and I used to go to games with my dad when I was little. We support Hawthorn, sadly they were knocked out in the semi-finals so we will barrack for Geelong against Port Adelaide for the Grand Final.)

Now, what about Scotland/Italy and New Zealand/Romania? "Kitty Hoose" is already weeping quietly into her pillows. I'm not that scary am I? (Anyone who says yes will have chalk chucked at them, isn't that right R?)

Whiti te ra,
Kirsten.





God Save The Team

The time has come,
A fact’s a fact,
It belongs to them,
We’re gonna give it back,
(BAM! BAM! BAM!)
How can we dance when our Earth is turning?
How do we sleep while our beds are burning?

(Beds are Burning. Midnight Oil.)

So yes, Ka Mate! indeed. (Ka mate means “I’m dead” in Maori) Nya Zullen (New Sullen?) is out of the RWC, along with Australia: but England is still there.

So, the big question which you all want to ask, did Kirsten get spanked?

Ha ha, did she ever!

1. Kirsten graciously offered Sarah (England) that if Australia lost Kirsten, Kiwi that she is, would accept spanking for it. Jasmine (Aussie) would get the prescribed six strokes of the ruler, but Kirsten would get six OTK slaps. Kirsten got six OTK slaps.

2. No French girls in the bet, so no-one to give Kirsten her well deserved six with the ruler. Or so one would think. Enter Elisabeth, who is German but TEACHES FRENCH, and hits like an Aussie batsman. Ouch bro!

3. Scotland, despite losing to Argentina, still scored more in doing so than New Zealand’s winning margin. (Obviously, since New Zealand lost.) So, Kirsten got a spank for each of Scotland’s points, plus two for the deficit against France, OCK, (over Catie’s knee) at home on Sunday night.

And now, with Australia and New Zealand both out of the competition, Jasmine and Kirsten both get six more spanks if either England or South Africa win their semi-finals! Since both will win, that’s twelve more smacks for Miss E come next Monday morning.

Stupid bloody bent ref…I hate Cardiff.

Seriously, well done to each of England, France, South Africa and Argentina, and also to Fiji and Scotland for making it so far. All four are worthy semi-finalists.

Now: who to support, RSA for my best mate, or England for where I live? I'll support both this week, and let you know when they reach the finals.

Kx.

Nkosi Sikelel' iAfrika

Kiaora,

So it's down to the final two, and not the two I wanted. For the first time I don't have a homeland to support in the RWC final: either Australia or New Zealand have played in one of the matches so far, (but never both at once).

So, here in blog form, as well as in comment, is the declaration.

I think South Africa will win.

I want England to win.

(It's not that I want South Africa to lose, but I live in England and it would be nice for the local side to defy the odds and win it again.) (Besides which, England are so CRAP at FOOTBALL we need to give them something.)

In other news it was National Stockings Day today in the United Kingdom, apparently a fundraiser for Breast Cancer research. More likely, since noone was actually collecting money that I saw, it was just another excuse to print images of scantily clad women across the nation's newspapers for the benefit of Solcredulists and the working classes, (ie men who buy Daily Sport ). At least Daily Sport had a pretty Aussie on the front today: Emily Scott. I know this because I confiscated a copy of said "newspaper" from one of the boys in Upper Eight. (Which makes a change from last week when the SAME boy had pictures of Jennifer Ellison in his locker. She's a pretty girl, but the idea of a boy having a Ms Ellison on his wall is not one that sits well with me. Daniel Roberts, my colleague, thinks it most amusing.)

(Besides which, I'm MISS Ellison so what's my fricken problem?)

I hope all you ladies of Britain got into the spirit of the day, but kept your garters to yourselves. (As I did.)

I am away next week again: sorry to miss you all, I promise you a new story soon. But in the meantime I feel it my duty (and relief) to tell you that all bets are OFF in the rugby. We are all so impressed that England has made the final that even if they lose there will be no spanking for anyone who is English or supports the England team. Naturally this means it's a bit unfair to spank Hanie DeKievert if the Boks actually lose, but since RSA have played so well, (better than anyone else) it's fair enough.

So, ha HA: bad luck spankos, there's nothing for you here!

(Let's just hope Curtseygirl's new stories make up for it.)

Enjoy your weekends and weeks ahead my lovelies, and be good girls and boys for your teachers.

Smooch!